Second Time Around

It is still a shock to receive a cancer diagnosis. Even though it’s happened before.

This time I’m calmer; it’s a world I already know. And it’s easier as I already know doctors I trust and who know me, or tolerate me as the case may be. Chuck is adept at research and only has to study up on what has changed in the past decade. He explained the current biopsy technique to me on the way to that appointment last Thursday and he already knows how to read the Path report I received Monday morning.

Despite my attention to diet, vigilance with my supplement schedule and constant reexamination of the happiness quotient of my life, cancer has appeared in my other breast. What shakes me deeply is realizing that what I have chosen to use to prevent this type of recurrence hasn’t worked.

Last time my diagnosis set off an intense period of severe mania. It made it impossible to sleep or work and even focusing to read or write was challenging. This is actually my most immediate health risk, so I’m keeping things as normal as possible and keeping my energy contained by limiting the conversations I have with others. This is part of the reason behind reactivating Five Years Plus. I can keep family and friends who want to follow my journey up to date. There is also the hope that someone going through the journey the first time might find something helpful here.

Anyway, I am working on getting a plan together without feeling overwhelmed, continuing to work and hopefully going ahead with my trip out West to play Canadian Nationals in a couple of weeks. One of my first steps is to consult with my surgeon to discuss my options and find out her schedule. When I showed up at my appointment today they had booked me with the wrong doctor. Since already having doctors I know is important to me, we turned around and went home. But not before the patient advocate assured me that I didn’t need to worry that cancer would be spreading if I waited until next week. This I know. I thought it was a nice touch though.

It does make me realize I need to get to know my GP’s office staff as it seems best to let them make the referrals.